Family played a significant role in David Bowie becoming the icon he is today. While his half-brother, Terry Burns, was the most crucial facilitator in his early development, introducing him to jazz, Beat Poetry and even Buddhism, the Starman’s father, Haywood Stenton ‘John’ Jone’, was also instrumental in influencing his trajectory.
In the early 1950s, Haywood brought home a collection of American 45s by rock ‘n’ roll pioneers such as Elvis Presley, Little Richard, Fats Domino and The Teenagers, and these exciting sounds left an indelible imprint on his young son’s mind. From that moment on, David knew he wanted to become a famous musician like the gyrating American stars. Sensing that his son was different from the average child, Haywood encouraged David to follow his dreams.
Haywood died from pneumonia on August 5th, 1969, aged 56. At 22 years old, this tragedy affected Bowie for the rest of his life. Although his father was crucial in giving him confidence in his abilities and encouragement, like with most father-son relationships, theirs was a complex one. Reflecting on his father’s passing some 24 years later in May 1993, Bowie revealed that despite Haywood’s impact on his life, he couldn’t ever talk to his father about the serious things, as was the standard in Britain during this period.
Bowie told Interview Magazine: “I could never, ever talk to my father. I really loved him, but we couldn’t talk about anything together. There was this really British thing that being even remotely emotional was absolutely verboten…”
Birthday memories of Haywood Stenton Jones, born this day in Doncaster, South Yorkshire in 1912. (David Bowie's father) pic.twitter.com/Q86PAZ4G2H
— David Bowie Wonderworld (@bowieww) November 21, 2022
Because of this barrier, after Bowie grew up, he would only ever return to his parents’ house for superficial things such as getting his washing done, or a proper meal.
“I never went back with a need to see them. I really felt like a user, which, of course, brought loads of regrets when my father died, in 1968 [sic],” he conceded. “It was at a point where I was just beginning to grow up a little bit and appreciate that I would have to stretch out my hand a little for us ever to get to know each other. He just died at the wrong damn time, because there were so many things I would love to have said to him and asked him about – all those stereotypical regrets when your father dies and you haven’t completed your relationship.”
Bowie had many lamentations, but the fact he never got to know his father on an emotional level was the one he could never reconcile. Years later, he would turn to his craft as a means of coming to terms with Haywood’s death. ‘Everyone Says ‘Hi’’, the second single from 2002’s Heathen, was penned about the tragedy.
Opening with the lines, “Said you took a big trip, they said you moved away /
Happened oh-so-quietly / they say / Shoulda took a picture, something I could keep”, the track is imbued with the torture of having things left unsaid.
In Nicholas Pegg’s 2000 book The Complete David Bowie, the musician explained the lyrics and feeling on the song: “When my father died in 1969, I couldn’t actually believe that he was not going to come back again. I kind of thought that he’d just put his raincoat and his cap on, and that he’d be back in a few weeks or something. And I felt like that for years. It really took a long time for me to be able to take in the fact that I wouldn’t see him again. So this one was just a little simplistic reference to that, about how it always feels like somebody has gone on a holiday of some kind.”
There’s no wonder that ‘Everyone Says ‘Hi’’ is one of David Bowie’s most stirring compositions. The pathos is truly palpable.
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- 2000s Music
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- Everyone Says Hi
- Family Influence
- Father-Son Relationship
- Haywood Stenton Jones
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